Someone hacked into Executive Homemaker and made a mess! Please be patient while we figure out the extent of the damage.

In the meantime, if you need a file for an upcoming event e-mail me and I’ll send it to you.

**Update – The hacker tried to put advertising banners on the home page which ended up corrupting the site. We’ve fixed the problem and it’s up and running again. Sorry for any inconvenience.

Shortly after I was married, and cooking hamburger helper successfully, I started to prepare to be the best mother ever. {{I can’t stop laughing because I’m not kidding}}

I’ll be honest with you, I thought I had it in the bag! Seeing my parents struggle with their relationship, I was more worried about being a wife than a mother. After all – I was armed with my list of “Things I’ll never do when I’m a mom” which also included “Things I will make sure to do” as well as “Things to be sure to tell my children and not expect them to figure it out on their own”. I was all ready. (Where’s that list now, you ask? I burned it in the sink sometime around year 4 of motherhood.)

So, I set out xeroxing, coloring, and laminating file folder games, family home evening lessons, and talks. I had visions of playing these games with my happy and willing child in loving bliss. In between kisses, hugs, and lots of clapping, of course.

A full Rubbermaid of laminated goodies, a baby shower, and 3 years later my oldest son was born. My divine role as mother had begun.

Can you say colic?

I’m in California with out any family, with out a car, and with a baby that takes two 20 min naps a day, wakes up at 5:30am, and finally goes to sleep for only 3 hours at a time at 9:00pm. During the day he’s nursing every 2 hours. My boobs are huge and get infected regularly and I’m barley functioning because of all the crying.

Motherhood was NOT what everyone said it would be.

To make a long story short(er) I managed through ignorance, got through denial, barely made it through martyrdom, had a very angry period but we won’t elaborate, cried and prayed a lot, was rescued by a team of angels and … after repeating many of the same stages … I’m now in acceptance.

“Hello, my name is Laurie and I won’t ever be the best Mom ever. Actually, I no longer want to be. I want to raise responsible boys who will grow up to be wonderful husbands and fathers. I’m willing to get my hands dirty to make that happen. I don’t want to enable, spoil, or play the martyr. Life is hard and many times we have cereal for dinner.”

Motherhood is different for all of us. I’ll never forget an Oprah I saw when Davis was 4 and at his most difficult. She was featuring several different mothers. One was saying that being a mother was the most wonderful experience ever and another one said “Being a mother sucks 80% of the time!”. I started crying. Finally someone could relate to how I was feeling.

My experience in being a Mother is listening to criticism of my children daily, figuring out how to teach them new skills by reading boring books instead of romantic novels, going through the tedious motions of trying to change those behaviors. In the meantime, knowing that you won’t know if it all works until they’re grown. All the while, hoping they won’t then resent you for what you’ve had to put them through to give them the best chance at a happy life.

My story reads more like a gothic novel than a Jane Austen classic but “that’s life”. I don’t expect to have my fairytale ending. That’s not my purpose in life. I’m just doing the best I can with what I’ve got and that’s ok.

So if you’re struggling with your divine role as mother, I am too. {{hugs}}